~Twilightjunkie94

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all things we couldn't be.

Nov 13, 2009, 1:27:22 PM by ~Twilightjunkie94
Literature / Poetry / Romantic / Teen / Free Verse

we were softly whispered goodbyes
on cold winter afternoons. we were hearts
that beated too fast and too slow at the
same time. we were the wind in each other's
hair, but we were not love.

we were walks in the park on sunny days
but without the picnics. we were the stars
in the sky on cloudy nights. we were the
gaps in between each other's fingers but,
we were not love.

we were the gasps in every lover's
tone. we were autum leaves falling
delicately to the ground. we were
heated glances across the room, but
we were not love.

we were half written love letters that
fell away with age. we were regret and
anger. we were laughter and tears.
we were trying. oh god, how we tried.
but we were not love.

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sorry? as life goes on, certain people become planted into the back of your mind and you're only allowed to think of them at certain times.

mine for you is at 2 am and when i drive down your road.

if love means you'll always care about whether the person is living or not, then i guess i loved you. love. present tense. past tense most of the time.
except for 2 am.

i'm brave enough to let you know that i can't sleep so i'm texting you instead but i think you sleep on rainy nights now. because it's not summer and life is good. we don't need each other anymore.
&nbssorry? by ~Twilightjunkie94

it happened it happened like this:
i was lying in his bed with no make up on and my hair a mess.
"do you think if we're together next halloween, we could do
matching costumes?"
"we'll be together, i'll never leave you."
i didn't say anything. i turned over and said,
"we could do something off of hey arnold."
i think that was my way of saying i was okay staying with
you forever, whatever that meant.

it happened like this:
it's amazing what you learn about a person a year later.
i'm fighting the urge to text you and tell you that maybe
you weren't as awful as i made you out to be.
enough.

it happened like this:
you're the only boy that it happened by ~Twilightjunkie94

i'm getting better, she didn't know what happened with us,
i was apart of your past. a ghost that
lingers because i can't decide if i'm
ready to let go of you yet.
she didn't know.

she doesn't know how gentle you
were. how your words were always
harsh and how when we finally got
together, you'd tear me apart. but
you were gentle and all i was left
with was a few bruises that eventually
faded and a touch that never left me.
it's been almost a year and i still
wake up in a cold sweat screaming your
name but it's getting better. it's getting better.i'm getting better, by ~Twilightjunkie94

october lullabys october means leaving
bright eyes, humming bird heart beats.
love in the eyes of the beholder.
4 years later it's the
difficulty of getting out
of bed and seeing your face everyday.
it's unanswered text messages and
"leavemealones". reasons unknown.
it's getting high and yelling
and not caring anymore.
october is everything you used
to be and everything i'm trying to let go of.october lullabys by ~Twilightjunkie94

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Thank You, Slater. I used to go to the nearby campus coffee shop in the early evenings, armed with a pen, a blank notebook, and writer's block. The sense of loneliness was unspoken but well accounted for.

I always shared coffee-counterspace with the same boy, who never smiled or talked and who had a penchant for bedhead and argyle sweaters. He liked to lean back on his stool, balancing precariously as he read novels, and I liked to pretend I wasn't watching him watch me. We coexisted in quiet companionship, thrived quietly under fluorescent lighting which sometimes caught his thick-framed glasses.

His novels changed while my notebook remained the same; his doThank You, Slater. by ~estallidos

october means this small, white room.
wooden piano bench.
intelligent fingers.
sad music, sad singer.

iwantthesongtobeaboutme,
about us.
about you wanting me.
about you wanting to.
about you.

i crave your smile, words, feelings.
i want you to say all of the things
you want to say to her to me someday.
i could pin you down under all of the
sadness i feel when i see you hurting.

small, twin bed.
hurtful words said.
drop dead feeling felt.
hard hugs and hand holdings.

please, get the fuck away from the left side of my brain.october means this by ~youaresolovely

October I miss smoking.
And it's not so much the feel of nicotine in my blood
because it never made me dizzy or jittery enough to feel alive
with all the rush.
I miss the smoke
and the alcohol i never seemed to hold in too well
and those nights we spent
leaning on empty lighthouses in the middle of winter
as i ran around collecting our plastic trash bags
as they waved around on the sand.
I miss the smell of something burning
and holding the opposite end of the ember
to my lips
as if i could light myself on fire
with each breath.
And maybe my excitement is made of hospital visits
and nights too blurry to remember properly
and cigareOctober by ~almostlovers

to feel dead it is something similar to being lost,
you once told me, hands fidgeting with mine between black sheets and our naked bodies. i didn't know what to say - because i guess i'd never really been lost.
you always spoke to me with quiet words and sincere eyes at this time of night, as though you could only ever really trust me in the dark. it reminded me of poets and love songs written on the back of take away food napkins, but you were nothing like a poet and you never wrote me a love song.
-
i trusted you too, though, only when it was dark. i cried and i cried into the hollowness of those nights, without ever really knowing what i was cryinto feel dead by ~rachel-rhapsody

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Devious Journal Entry

Nov 19, 2011, 12:41:59 PM by ~Twilightjunkie94
Journals / Personal

i have a boyfriend and he's very nice.

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~Twilightjunkie94

whatever you want it to be.
Artist

United States

i fade out a lot.

Current Residence: in between his ribs.
Favourite genre of music: music that speaks to me
Skin of choice: cold and soft
Personal Quote: "Put your heart in my hands, I will never paint your world blue."

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Comments

~loopy-lexy Dec 19, 2010

Thank you for the fave a little while back, sorry for the delay in saying so =]

--
_{always fight, until you can't anymore, and then be fought for.}

~Twilightjunkie94 Dec 20, 2010

no problem

--
^{you're my sweetest downfall. i loved you first.}

~ILoveYouHopie Nov 15, 2010

thanks for the fave, dollbaby.

~Twilightjunkie94 Nov 16, 2010

you're welcome babycakes <3

--
^{you're my sweetest downfall. i loved you first.}

~loopy-lexy Oct 23, 2010

Thanks for the fave =]

--
_{always fight, until you can't anymore, and then be fought for.}

~ILoveYouHopie Sep 18, 2010

thanks for faving tuesday, honey bunches!

~Twilightjunkie94 Sep 18, 2010

you're welcome lovey! i meant to when i commented it but i guess i got too distracted at the time.

--
^{you're my sweetest downfall. i loved you first.}

~ILoveYouHopie Jul 12, 2010

thanks for the favorite, darlin'.

~Twilightjunkie94 Jul 12, 2010

you're welcome (: thanks for mine too! i hope to be seeing you soon.

--
^{you're my sweetest downfall. i loved you first.}

~loopy-lexy May 18, 2010

Thank you so much for the fave!

--
_{always fight, until you can't anymore, and then be fought for.}

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~Twilightjunkie94

all things we couldn't be.

all things we couldn't be.

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